Why? What For?

I am going to be frank. These last 16-18 months have been hard, VERY hard here in Texas and the U.S. And it is not just me.

I was asked today “Why do you insist on living where you live?” The mere fact that the question was asked was indicative of the ignorance of the person asking. They obviously did not know, could not comprehend—not that they really tried—to have any clue WHY I live where I want to live and WHY I live the way I want to live.

Does it really take such brutal honesty, in their face words, to infer upon them WHY I am who I am and I am where I want to be right now?


I have learned over many decades that yes, it does indeed take frank, BLUNT honesty to make many people see, to understand what it means to “be true to one’s self.” And isn’t that what a life well lived is all about? To live true to self? To live in a way that impacts not only others, but also makes yourself whole? That you BELONG in this time, right here, right now if you are acutely aware of your place and purpose… with everyone you are with and your family?

I say yes. Actually, I scream YES!

What else is living life for(?)… with those you deeply love and care for and try to play your important part in the big scheme of everyone in this time, in this moment?

~ ~ ~ § ~ ~ ~

About a week ago I FINALLY went—physically—to my needed in-person doctors follow-up appointment. It had been over a year since I was able to do so. I suspect MANY people were not able to physically, in-person, see their physician… because of the whole COVID-19 disaster.

A week later, after blood-work and necessary lab-work my doctor felt necessary to obtain, for understandable causes that he was seeing in most all of his patients, he wanted additional tests with my blood-work. Unfortunately, a lot more money too for this lab-work. But it was very needed. Most intelligent people/patients understood that going over 1-year without physically seeing your physician and not being able to give your blood to them… was critically important.

My physician reentered my Exam Room and asked, “I would like to also test your Vitamin D levels. Is that okay? It is an additional cost of X-amount of dollars (not cheap), but I really think it is important to check. Is that alright?” I replied yes of course. “I expected the entire gament of whatever you wanted” I said to him “in this overdue visit. That’s fine.

Those results have come back. Not only were they not good, my physician said “Dwain, they are horrendous.

Apparently the healthy range for a person’s vitamin D level is 30-100 (ng/mL). My doctor told me mine was a dismal, shocking “9.” I could hear it in his voicemail to me.

If you do not know why vitamin D is important to our health, allow me to briefly explain. WebMD.com explains Vitamin D Defiency this way:

If you shun the sun, suffer from milk allergies, or adhere to a strict vegan diet, you may be at risk for vitamin D deficiency. Known as the sunshine vitamin, vitamin D is produced by the body in response to skin being exposed to sunlight. It is also occurs naturally in a few foods—including some fish, fish liver oils, and egg yolks—and in fortified dairy and grain products.

Vitamin D is essential for strong bones, because it helps the body use calcium from the diet. Traditionally, vitamin D deficiency has been associated with rickets, a disease in which the bone tissue doesn’t properly mineralize, leading to soft bones and skeletal deformities. But increasingly, research is revealing the importance of vitamin D in protecting against a host of health problems.

Needless to say, prolonged vitamin D deficiency from not being out and about, in the Sun, with or without others (strangers included) is NOT GOOD for a healthy human life. Well DUH, right? But that hasn’t really been so possible for the last 16-18 months has it?

But in indirect ways I knew this was the sort of sacrifice the team HAD to do. I have been a recluse, a hermit basically, for the last year and four or six months. Why? Because that’s public health & safety. Plain and simple. I also wore a mask every time I HAD to got out in public for necessary life-priority items. I also stayed at least 6-10 feet away from anyone—despite the fact that many DID NOT do that and worse, were not wearing a god dayum mask! Which disturbed me and kept me inside, alone, out of the Sun (for vitamin D) so that I would not contribute MORE death, MORE hospitalizations to overrun, overburdened hospitals and ICU’s.

Despite my happy sacrifice for “the team,” for the public, for a known recovery and possible elimination of this god dayum viral pandemic, I am now Vitamin D Deficient along with 4-5 other medical conditions exacerbated by this virus. This is not to mention the OTHER ripple-effects, impacts (financially) this continued pandemic has caused… because Texas and America DOES NOT have enough “team players.

For the rest of the world, PLEASE PLEASE do not call us by anything other than the Disunited States of America. We have far too many egotistical, self-gratifying imbeciles to be worthy of a name, an honorable team-name such as the UNITED States of America. No, that has disappeared many years ago because we prefer to nurture, promote, and celebrate individuals, those who do whatever they fucking wish “In the name of freedom, liberty, blah blah blah…” and NOT for a greater good, but instead for their own benefit, their own ideology, their own patriotism, wealth and political party. God Bless America and God Bless our opulent Wealth—Screw Everyone Else.

Que the national anthem… “Star Spangled Banner” of American Self, Self, and more wealthy Self. Dog eat dog and screw everyone else. We are the nation everyone wants to immigrate to. HAH! How very very funny and yet, incomprehensibly a Catch-22. Ah, maybe it’s just Texas. 🥴

By the way, I am trying very hard to finish my family vacation posts with pictures, videos and tales of joy, laughter, and foolery of our adventures to the beautiful Mackinac Island, Michigan. Unfortunately, many extenuating circumstances here keep impeding this progress—all due ultimately to new COVID-19 variants and their ripple-effects everywhere in life. Plain and simple.

Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Science Always

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49 thoughts on “Why? What For?

    • (in a heavy somber sulk)…

      I am so sorry BHoBB. I truly am. Because I know this all could’ve been avoided or AT LEAST so much better handled if we had had competent federal and widespread State leadership—something that is critical with pandemics, pandemics based on sound medical science.

      I have been so heart-broken and dismayed by our statistics as well. The other day I came across a couple—white, not that that should matter—in their early or mid-20’s (male & female) all giddy, happy, BUT… not wearing masks because like MANY Red states, Texas has been super hyper relaxed these entire last 2-years about the pandemic, and they were baffled as to why I didn’t want to get on the elevator with them, wearing my mask and social-distancing.

      I said, “No, go ahead. Thank you though,” The man said, “Are you sure?” And I replied “Yes. Thank you, but we are nowhere NEAR done with this horrible coronavirus.” The woman laughed (as if drunk) and said “YES! Thank you for noticing!” Geezzz. 🤦‍♂️ They let the doors close and I waited until the next available EMPTY elevator.

      BHoBB… whether those two were vaccinated or not, WHY on Earth were they not wearing required masks by the building and NOT social-distancing!?

      This is what I am surrounded by here while many hospitals are now AGAIN being overrun by UNvaccinated infected hospitalizations. And all of those front-line medical workers have NOT EVEN had a break yet from this sheer stupidity!

      It honestly breaks my heart. Because I DO NOT want to go thru another 2020 like we did! I am so SO very tired. 😔

      Liked by 2 people

      • I’m right there with you Professor. We actually had to cancel an Uber ride because the driver wasn’t wearing a mask even though the company mandates them. My husband and I were vaccinated several months ago, but we have still continued with social distancing and masking. We have a neighbor who laughed at us for being “sheep,” who wound up being quarantined with COVID for 14 days. I was verbally rebuked in a grocery store recently by a woman who took offense that I was wearing a mask. It’s just endless.

        Liked by 2 people

  1. I wouldn’t sweat the mask stuff: it’s fluff. Anything less than a N-95 does nothing other than stop droplets. But the virus isn’t about droplets; it’s aerosolized. That means it’s all about concentration, about breathing shared air. Masks do not mitigate this at all. That’s why it’s fluff. However, that being said, if masking makes others feel a little more secure, then sure. Social niceties. What matters is vaccination, which I think shouldn’t be tied to masks. It should be the only message going out because it’s the only thing that mitigates the symptoms of getting Covid. And we’re all going to get it, not because of people not wearing masks but because it is highly contagious, aerosolized, and has reservoirs outside of humanity. Throw in the fact that children under 12 can’t get vaccinated yet and the size of the virus is ~.2 microns which will pass easily through masks both in and out with every breath, and it will be a while before the 85% threshold can be reached and maintained by designed boosters to handle the next strains of Covid. We’ll get there. Once more kids start being hospitalized and dying from parental uncertainty and inaction about vaccinations in this 4th wave, I think we’ll see a new surge in vaccine popularity. Add in the number of business and venues and services that will demand proof of vaccination, and it just becomes something that needs to get done sooner than later.

    Pushing vaccination is the single message that should be, that needs to be, hammered home consistently not just by public figures but delivered by health care professionals non stop and across all other affiliations. Anti-vaxers should be cast as the danger they are, consistently and without consideration for their feelings, because they are. They’re just as much a menace to children (and everyone else, but focusing on children who cannot yet get vaccinated sells better) as the very worst pedophile and we need to do a better job, a more consistent job, linking unnecessary suffering and death of innocent children to not getting vaccinated.

    So I wouldn’t invest the emotional energy in masking. That’s not the problem.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Currently in Texas only 50.8% to 53.2%* are FULLY vaccinated. I honestly do not consider that a ticker-tape parade celebration given the fact that since late March vaccines have been easily available to Texans. It is now August. That speaks volumes right there about the intelligence of most Texans. Those are the hardcore facts of data Tildeb. I’m far from thrilled by our response to this. It is pure and unequivocal stupidity, Plain and simple. This pandemic DID NOT have to be so devastating had we had intelligent, science-based citizens and a much more competent State and Federal leadership, excluding our CDC leadership Anthony Fauci and hopefully Rochelle Walensky.

      Without any question, this pandemic should’ve been over in the summer of 2020, at the latest.

      * – Source: https://apps.texastribune.org/features/2020/texas-coronavirus-cases-map/

      Liked by 1 person

      • Well, it should have handled better, that’s for sure. So many unnecessary deaths. It should have been widely understood to be an aerosol virus because I knew this in May of 2020 having the music organization I belong to fund an aerosol study out of Colorado that fit the data beautifully. But even knowing this, I doubt the pandemic could have been stopped by lockdowns; at best, the virus spread could have been massively reduced if more people understood the transmission dangers better along with a consistent message about this process from the CDC. This would have made it more difficult to deny than secondary issues like mask wearing coming to the forefront.

        Liked by 2 people

        • I’m in complete agreement Tildeb. Well said. (nods in respect)

          My sometimes excessive inclinations for perfection, a job VERY well done with nothing overlooked… gets the best of me. I can blame in part my USMC father for this noble value and principle… that often annoys most it seems. 🙄

          Liked by 1 person

  2. I am ambivalent re the Vitamin D deficiency thing. I got tired of my doctor telling me that I was Vit D deficient at the end of each winter when we don’t see the sun for months and when we do, we are bundled up. Of course we are Vit D deficient, and I am also almost 75 years old. I am not about to die from any Vit D deficiency disease. Give it a rest Docs.

    Liked by 2 people

    • The deficiency can and does have very real health-related negative consequences especially for older people (unless you like osteoporosis, weaker bones, and enriching your favourite dentist), which is a shame considering how easy it is to get enough Vitamin D through a combination of sun and diet regardless of locale. (Sure, Bella Bella is not that north, but 330 days of rain makes getting enough Vitamin D through sunlight next to impossible.) There’s a reason so much food is fortified with it because outside of certain fish oils it can be challenging to meet the daily requirement but, really, it’s easy enough to have a diet that includes enough Vitamin D. Of course, this involves eating, which is subject now to ever-stricter moral concerns and prohibitions that have nothing to do with health and welfare of those who eat. So not having enough Vitamin D as a chronic condition is really more of a strange life choice to be deficient (and accept all the consequences) rather than a medical concern treatable by occasional intervention.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Personally, along with diet, I’ve been medically advised to take Vitamin D in capsule form. It has helped, based on lab tests, but it isn’t the end-all, cure-all. And above and beyond … age and heredity definitely play a role.

        Liked by 2 people

        • I am learning MUCH about aging Nan. It is so exciting, don’t you think!? 😁 😉

          In fact, it seems these past 5-6 years, especially the last 16-18 frustrating months… that I am becoming a well-read, well-studied, and well-wealth-of-knowledged epidemiologist of well-not-so-healthy medical intern in the making, I think! 😄

          Liked by 2 people

  3. PT, my response to the first part of your post related to your “anger” against those who badger you about your current state of residence … perhaps if you shared less of your loathing at the existing conditions people would be less inclined to say anything. Hmmm??

    This isn’t to say that there aren’t personal health benefits to “spouting off,” but the response you receive as a result — is it really so unusual?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I humbly accept your wisdom and typical stoic composer Nan. I do admire it and wish I had your tried-n-true demeanor in these conditions. If it is any consolation, this “loathing” (correctly put) is done almost exclusively here online, on my blog. But still… I know it can become or seem like a non-stop banging of a cymbal. My apologies. I will always welcome your gentle, but direct warnings for me. 😉 They are almost always spot-on. 🥰 You are like the smart big sister I never had! Not that you’d have the least bit desire to be related, HAH! But… you know what I mean.

      When I am not infrequently triggered or “spouting off” (another correctly put description Ma’am) online, I usually only vent, raw like this, to my Mother or sister—and they, like you, let me know REAL quick and just as firmly… they are reaching or have reached their listening limit. It’s typically about 15-seconds; 30 on a good day, or they’ve just put down their phone and walked away. 😄 “Did I lose you?” I ask, “Did the signal drop?” Ahh, I do love my family’s blunt honesty with me, as I do anyone else with the tact and talent to do it endearingly.

      Isn’t that another gift we obtain in our greying years, Nan? Tough skin, wrinkly skin that rolls with the punches… and hopefully doesn’t become a deep purple contusion for 2-3 months? 😉

      Liked by 2 people

      • I’m SINCERELY relieved that you don’t take my “coaxing” in a negative way! Oftentimes, I’m simply hoping you’ll take a moment and look beyond what’s happening (remember our lady love conversation?) for deeper understanding.

        I admit some of this comes with AGING (oh how I age that word!), and one day you’ll undoubtedly see things from a different perspective. In the meantime … I try to plant some seeds. 😍

        Liked by 2 people

          • I noticed up above the Murphy’s Law-Ghost in the Machine is also making me appear like an unintelligible Neanderthal… playing a nemesising game with me as well, Nan! 🤨 Grrrrrrr.

            CORRECTION!! “…your wisdom and typical stoic COMPOSURE Nan.” (How in the heck did “composer” get inserted?!!?? Ha-Ha) 🤭

            Damn law-ghosts in machines named Murphy! DAMN THEM ALL!!!

            Liked by 2 people

  4. I don’t have to seriously worry about Vit D deficiency. I Am Vitamin (D)oug after all!
    Furthermore, Johannesburg gets oodles of sunshine so a 5 min stroll Dan’s le Jardin and I’m topped up, no probs.

    As for living in Texas.
    It seems the main objection is the fact YOU live there, Dwain.
    This I can wholly understand.
    Knowing such a curmudgeonly old fart like you lived within 200 miles would be enough to start a lemming run.
    Do the honorable thing and move. Have you considered Anchorage?

    Liked by 1 person

    • 😄 I so thoroughly enjoy great, witty British overstatement or understatement in pressure-cooker moments! Three of my all-time favorites follow below.

      A cannonball has just removed the leg of the Earl of Uxbridge during the Battle of Waterloo and the Duke of Wellington is nearby with him…

      Earl of Uxbridge: “By God, Sir, I’ve lost my leg!”

      Duke of Wellington: “By God, Sir, so you have!”

      A British Airways jetliner Flight 9 has just flown thru the stratospheric cloud of Mount Galunggung’s volcanic eruption. Captain Eric Moody of the Boeing 747 comes on the plane’s loudspeakers and announces…

      “Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped…”.

      Upon discovering by chance one of the 20th-century’s greatest medical breakthroughs: penicillin, Sir Alexander Fleming was actually studying an entirely different bacteria at the time. He later remarked wholly modestly or grossly understated…

      “One sometimes finds, what one is not looking for.”

      Do the honorable thing and move you say? Ahh, right. And I say…

      “Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the eldest son/Leader speaking. We have a small problem. We are a bit short of rescuing reinforcements, of living or sane soldiers, and entirely surrounded by the enemy. Does anyone by chance have a shovel or spade handy?”

      Does that Morse-code telegram help Ark, regarding our/my fighting status? 😁

      Liked by 1 person

            • Apparently it originated in the trenches of WW1 and the original message passed soldier to soldier started out as: Send reinforcements. We ‘re going to advance!

              It’s probably an urban myth but funny all the same.

              Saw the highlights of the Chelsea / Villareal game this afternoon.
              Looked like a nail biter.

              Liked by 1 person

            • The Super Cup game was quite entertaining I must say. Villarreal put up a fantastic fight, both sides had long spells of creative possession and attempts at goal… for sure! It was worth all 94+ minutes, extra time, and PK’s too! Wish I had recorded it. 🙂


            • Nevermind Ark. 👍🏼 I looked it up. The Google Goddess explained it all to me in a wealthy long, long, LONG information list. 😆

              Once again, your delightful, soothing humor has made my day my Friend. Thank you! 😉

              Liked by 1 person

            • 😄 Hah! Well, I’ve found there’s one positive spin with each move and advancing years of age, especially the last quarter of one’s lifetime. You have a moment? 😉

              Eventually you carry less and less with each move—your shoulders and back can only haul so much weight. Over the years and all the many moves, if you PAY strangers to move everything for you, at some point in all those moves the male-mules (or females?) who have no attachment whatsoever to your things/valuables, break or misplace or lose items… (steal?)… which in other ways ends up costing you even more, e.g. uncheap insurance policies. More costs, either monetarily and/or sentimentality and typically never to be fully replaced or the same. Hence, you plan for those sacrifices, losses with each move, again not necessarily literally either. And Ark, I’ve lost many, MANY a vanished or broken item—and not necessarily in inanimate objects either.

              Nor is there a guarantee that your “stuff” (tangible or intangible) will be wanted by your offspring or following generations. Hahaha! Consequently then, and this isn’t all bad… your wagon, so to speak, gets lighter and lighter and lighter, until you have no more need for the beasts of burden OR that dayum wagon! 😆


            • 🤣🤣🤣 Truth sometimes gives us an additional orifice… always in places we’d prefer NOT to have it. Just make sure your fly is zipped-up and your belt is tight enough to keep your knickers fixed. 😉

              Liked by 1 person

            • They looked pretty good, I must say. Mo’s goal was a pearler!
              Interesting snippet. Norwich are the only self-funded team in the EPL.
              Who knew?

              Liked by 1 person

            • But if we don’t move often enough, soon we’re planting… gardens… with way more work than stuffing and moving boxes once in a while… and using toilet paper rolls for seedlings. Good grief.

              Liked by 3 people

            • Oi! While I am not at the point of using the Matt Damon self-waste fertilise method I can at least start at the ‘bottom’ end of things when it comes to my gardening!

              Liked by 1 person

            • Don’t think I didn’t understand those handy ice cream containers had to be emptied first. “I’m buying all these Strawberry Cheesecake and Salted Caramel ice creams for my garden, Dear, for those wee little seedlings, y’see.”

              Liked by 3 people

            • Why, it’s a community effort! Sacrifices must be made… in the name of gardening.

              “These ice cream containers aren’t going to empty themselves, people. Ark needs us to do our part.”

              Liked by 3 people

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