Oncoming High-Beams

As many of you with at least high school diplomas, obtained by satisfactory-to-exceptional test scores and grades in biology class, and as those of you with under-grad degrees who perhaps had college-level biology, cytology, epidemiology, or virology as part of your coursework know… we are once again being forced urged by our health professionals—as a communal courtesy—to return to necessary public health & safety measures and mandates because of sharply rising new COVID-19 cases. I am more than happy to do this and whatever it takes as my civic part to stem and eradicate this pandemic. But why yet again, are we having to do this with seemingly MORE vocalized defiance and hecklers screaming of their Constitutional individual liberties being violated?

The Great Seal of the United States

It’s quite simple. Four major reasons: 1) our public health systems are going through yet another mass surge in new COVID-19 cases with the Delta and now Omicron variants causing the spike because of 2) a dismal public percentage rate of fully vaccinated teenagers and adults across the nation, and this is caused by 3) a large percentage of defiant anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers who do not know or understand the reliable, proven medical science behind all these public safety measures. And as a secondary consequence of those three reasons, 4) the latter naïve-defiant percentage continue to spread erroneous information and logic upon more naïve people.

The other day I serendipitously stumbled into a 10-15 minute conversation, if it could be called that, going on with our property manager and two other residents. We three residents had been to our mailboxes about the same time; they are near the management office inside the main building. When I walked up the conversation was about the return of mask mandates (indoors) at places of business “open to the public,” etc. This would naturally effect our property seeing that its corporate HQ was out of state. I was not going to miss out on the viewpoints or explanations these three ladies voiced, including the property manager’s personal opinions on the subject of public health & safety, COVID, and the fact that all of us were going into our THIRD YEAR (2022) of losing this biological war which has now claimed 842,465+ Americans dead and still counting.

You ask, What does this have to do with “Oncoming High-Beams” on night time streets and highways?

More misinformation, ignorance, and faulty logic being spread

It has to do with one of the opinions and justifications given by one of the residents and vigorously supported by the property manager. What was said and justified? One elderly resident complained that she had every Constitutional right to wear on her body (face) whatever she wished, or not wished to, and whether or not she wished to be vaccinated was “her personal choice as well.” This was what was proclaimed, then strenuously reaffirmed by the Pro-Trumpeter property manager.

Since the conversation was in an open forum, or not being privately held in a closed-door office, I felt it was perfectly within my capacity to also share my thoughts of masking back up, getting vaccinated and boostered, and being a civic team-player, not a lone prima-donna. I was happy to be equally candid too. Once an opportunity to interject was afforded, I took my chance with gusto!

Oncoming super high-beam headlights

I interrupted and asked:

“Mrs. So-n-So and Ms. Misty Property Manager, do you enjoy driving at night on highways or streets and oncoming cars or the typical Texas monster-hunting trucks have lit not only their high-beam lights blinding you, but also have on their fog-lamps or hunting spotlights shining directly into your face making it impossible to see the road ahead, much less anything in or crossing the road or highway? Is that safe?”

Usually I get a paused silence when I ask angry anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers this question. I wait for either A) the intelligent, thought-out answer, or B) the pure asinine (selfish?) answer. Don’t ask me how many times I get the B-answer. I live in the Hill Country of central Texas! By the way, I was the only one there wearing a mask and intentionally staying 5-6 feet from everyone present. Also, myself, Mom, and sister are all fully vaccinated as well as boostered, by my persistent prodding I might add. We happily did our necessary civil parts (as team players) and as quickly as was possible, especially with the boosters.

After everyone silently stared at each other for 10-20 seconds, I asked my second question to Ms. Misty Property Manager…

“Misty, you have three kids. Your youngest is 12 or 13-yrs old, yes?” She acknowledges me. “How would you feel if I told you that I could CARELESS if I drove through her school zone at 70 MPH every day or through your residential neighborhood or your nearby park playground every day because that’s my individual liberty and right to do so? Would you applaud me for it?

More blank stares and silence.

I grinned at all three ladies and as I turned to go out the building’s doors I politely told them, THAT is public health and safety working correctly for ALL caring, law-abiding Americans. THAT is why ‘E Pluribus Unum’ is engraved on the Great Seal of the United States.”

I bid them all a very good, safe holidays and exited.

If a person has even half an ounce of compassion, decency, and care for other’s welfare, then there is not one single good reason or any justification a sane, intelligent person with a heart can give to be a loud-mouthed anti-masker or anti-vaxxer. None. Period.

Live Well – Love Much – Laugh Often – Learn Always – Be A TeamPlayer

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Stage 5 Dementia

As some of you know, since at least the Spring and Summer of 2018 my sister and I have been trying to manage from near and afar our Mom’s progressing Dementia. Sister and I both agreed then, since then, and especially last Aug. to the present that Mom’s cognitive capacities have noticeably declined, apparently significantly into Stage 5… and approaching Stage 6, if she isn’t already there.

What are the stages of Dementia? It seems the general consensus is as follows:

Stage 1: No Cognitive Decline/Normal Behavior

Parents in this stage show no obvious signs (yet) and appear to function daily with no issues.

Stage 2: Very Mild Decline/Forgetfulness

During this stage of dementia, your parent might innocently forget things such as names of others, of places, and events. Things are more frequently misplaced around the house, familiar objects such as keys and phones. But, not to the point where you can’t tell normal age-related memory loss from serious memory deterioration. These symptoms are not noticeable to other people.

Stage 3: Mild Decline

At this stage family members begin to notice subtle changes and signs that “something is off and not right.” Parents in this stage tend to be more regularly forgetful than ever. Your parent might begin missing several doctor’s appointments or social meetings. These tend to happen more frequently. They also have difficulty finding the right words to say if you’re talking to them. If dementia patients still work or do home chores, you’ll notice a decrease in work performance and they usually find it hard to focus or concentrate. This stage can manifest from 2 years and can last up to 7 years.

Stage 4: Moderate Decline

In this stage of dementia, the signs and symptoms become visible to everyone. A parent suffering from this stage struggles to count their money right or manage their finances like how to pay bills. This stage happened acutely to my mother this past June thru August. Not fun at all. Also, your mom may have a hard time recalling what she had for breakfast, any recent or other past events. Dementia may prevent a patient at this stage from traveling alone to new places. Otherwise, they will easily get lost. This is now real for sister and I and has sadly happened to me with her this past October. Completing tasks is also a struggle as they cannot focus their attention.

Now for my Mom’s Stage(s)…

Stage 5: Moderately Severe Decline

People affected in this later stage may need more help in their daily living activities like taking a bath or using the toilet or dressing appropriately. Mom isn’t at this full stage for the moment, only about half or more of the symptoms/behavior are present. But parents in Stage 5 forget facts about themselves, such as their address or phone number, possibly even their own name (not Mom). They are also unable to know what time or date it is and cannot tell where they are—definitely where Mom is at now. But, they can still recognize close family and friends or recall childhood memories. This stage lasts around 1.5 years. Mom then, would be nearing the end of these 18-months.

Stage 6: Severe Decline (Late Dementia)

During these later stages, parents suffering from this illness need frequent-to-constant supervision at home. Mom is essentially at the start of this stage. Your parent might need help with day-to-day living activities like washing, eating, or dressing up. It’s also worthy to note that dementia patients may now suffer from incontinence at this stage—fortunately right now, Mom does not. They frequently forget the names of family members, recent and major events in the past. She is not to this point.

Your parent may start to lose language already, trying to find the right words to say. Mom struggles with this every day now. Also, people under this stage suffer from personality and emotional changes, delusions, compulsions, and anxiety. Mom has a few of these manifestations. They may become violent and aggressive which can be upsetting and difficult to cope up with if you are caring for them—fortunately Mom is not at all acting out. Although they might be very confused, they can still recognize the people closest to them like family, friends, or relatives. This stage can last for about 2.5 years.

This is the stage my sister and I dread most…

Stage 7: Very Severe Decline (Late Dementia)

At this final stage, many parents need 24/7 care and support from professional caregivers to help them in their daily living conditions. This scares the ba-JEBUS out of me, if I’m honest. I don’t completely trust strangers with my Mom in this stage.

Seniors living in nursing homes may already experience severe loss of motor skills like walking, and caregivers are the ones feeding them. A parent in this late stage cannot clearly speak anymore or words become unintelligible. So hand or body gestures may be their only way of communicating or none at all. More often than not, many patients die before they even reach this final stage due to other health complications or conditions. This stage can last from 1.5 to 2.5 years. This MUST be the most devastating stage for children to witness and endure. I am not the least bit interested in coping through this phase… so I’m preparing now.

~ ~ ~ § ~ ~ ~

“Adapt or perish, now as ever, is Nature’s inexorable imperative.”

H.G. Wells

After much research, reading, and consulting with professionals and children with the same parental disease, I’ve learned that Mom shows most of the signs of “Mixed dementia” coupled with Vascular and Lewy-Body dementia. The hardest things I’ve struggled with these last 4-months living with Mom as her full-time caregiver are:

  • Patience — this is by far the hardest adjustment I’ve had to make with Mom. She used to be quite sharp, witty, usually on her toes, if you will, expressing herself well, even vividly when she felt the need to. Now it seems it is the opposite. I must remind her several times a day what’s going on, who that person is (their name) outside walking the Senior Community complex for exercise—something I really struggle motivating her to do as well.
  • Misplaced or Lost Items — this is a daily mystery and scavenger hunt. In trying to start routines, always having needed daily house items in the exact same place every single day, this turns out to be one of the most frustrating exercises we go through. Some days it is maddening and I feel as if I’m about to lose my mind… and patience. Ugh. And perhaps the HARDEST of these now:
  • The Right Words and Phrasing for Her — I am having to drastically change my communication style (in the normal younger world) to what Mom requires. I have always been direct, candid, very honest, unusually concise with my thoughts, feelings, intentions, etc., because my last 30-35 years in relationships—particularly with women, family, many friends of both genders—has painfully and in folly taught me how astoundingly critical good-to-excellent communication is and not a hit-n-miss ordeal. On the contrary, it is vital in avoiding undue harm, confusion, and further exacerbated problems from poor/short and vague communication. Some of you in our WordPress circle know or can imagine how incredibly challenging this is for me. HAH!

I have had to overhaul these personal habits, formed over some three decades, into another personality I am quite alien to and doing it like a bumbling idiot. Yes, more frustration, but it is internalized frustration! I cannot ever intentionally, in stubbornness make my Mom’s final years a frequent battle where I am her combatant. I’d never be able to live with myself if that happened. Hence, my own personal issues, lifestyles, social desires, and mid-term/long-term plans MUST be shelved indefinitely, as Mom’s condition worsens to a point when I have no choice but to adapt again… or perish, as H.G. Wells appropriately puts it.

Below are ten important tips to talking (and not talking) with your parent suffering from progressive dementia. I’ve managed to find these pointers from Wingate Healthcare, a Senior Health and Residence provider specializing in geriatric diseases and assistance. I’m happy I did. They drive home how little I knew about living with severe dementia. I’m humbled and have much work ahead.

Living with and learning intimately Mom’s new intensive needs these last four months, I’ve come to a stark realization of just how much I must change and remove, reform, and greatly refine my care for her. If this wasn’t a serious challenge already, at the moment I will not be getting any significant assistance with her. With our Texas courts reopened this past September after an entire year of COVID-19 shutdowns, my sister’s late 2019 felony drug-possession hearing was finally finished by the Kerr County judge. The timing is not ideal in the least. He has made her 3-year probation hectic with multiple regular “societal paybacks,” random urine tests, and P.O. visits biweekly she must by law fulfill or else return to prison. Sister is also a Halfway House Mother with 7-8 ladies (outpatients) in residence arriving from inpatient A&D rehabs. This encouraged the judge to reduce her probation down to three years instead of five. Therefore, despite her sincere Springtime hope earlier this year to help take care of Mom, at least part-time with me if not more, now it is made impossible. She can barely come to see Mom and help more than twice a week for only 2-3 hours or less.

It all once again, falls completely to me. These various events have been overwhelming. I am being forced to overhaul adapt to these new life-altering care lessons for Mom’s Stage 5 Dementia. Eye-opening is probably an understatement. Soon to be 59-yrs old, several of these ten tips for me have been very challenging habits to tweak or stop all together.

How to Talk to Your Parent with Severe Dementia

  1. Don’t ask your loved one with dementia, ‘Remember when…? This can be a frustrating and painful experience when you ask your loved one and he or she struggles to jog his or her memory. It’s better to lead the conversation with “I remember when…” instead. Wouldn’t it be great if he or she can search their memory calmly without feeling embarrassed? Don’t force it if the person starts to get confused. Just change the topic if they feel agitated.
  2. Don’t say ‘I’ve just told you that’ or ‘You’ve asked me that already Saying these phrases only reminds the person of their condition. Don’t think that words aren’t hurting them inside. Besides, there’s no sense passing your frustration over repetitive answers or questions to somebody with dementia. Try to be polite or respectful and patient when you talk to your loved one who has dementia. It’s crucial that they feel understood and listened to.
  3. Don’t remind your mom or dad of the death of someone or a pet. If your parent says they just talked to Aunt Jane, whom you know died some 15 years ago, don’t convince them this wasn’t possible. Go with it, just don’t argue anymore. It’s advisable to avoid disagreeing with trivial things. Why? Because you may remind them to relive the grief or pain of losing someone again.

    When your parent asks for somebody who passed away, it’s better to come up with another reason behind their absence. Remember, always be sensitive enough to gently remind them depending on their condition. It’s so much better to address the emotion behind this, maybe the person is feeling worried and needs to feel reassured. You can say, ‘Tell me about your sister Jane’ is a good alternative response. Don’t disagree or agree, just let it be. This reduces distress and also treats the person with respect by acknowledging their beliefs and feelings.
  4. Don’t tell them ‘You’re wrong’ or ‘That’s not right’. We can’t stress this enough but you should not disagree or argue with a person suffering from dementia. Admiral Nurse Emily Oliver of Dementia UK’s consultant, explains that this technique is called ‘validation therapy‘. It helps people talk to persons with dementia with more empathy and understanding by emphasizing emotions instead of facts. It’s important to remember that what they are feeling, experiencing, or saying is validated – even if it’s not the reality.
  5. Don’t use long and complex sentences. It’s best to use short and simple sentences as much as possible. Long and complicated ones can be hard for them to understand. It confuses them even more. Their cognitive abilities slow down and it’s difficult for them to process several ideas all at once. Moreover, avoid speaking fast and in loud environments, it’s good to wait until you have the person’s full attention before you start conversing with them.
  6. Don’t ask ‘What did you do this morning or ‘How was your day? Don’t pepper open-ended questions like this to people with dementia . It can be stressful for them if they can’t seem to find the answer. So it’s best to avoid asking them. Questions that are answerable by yes or no or with more defined options are way better. Instead of asking ‘what would you like to have for breakfast’, you could suggest, ‘Would you like a cup of tea or coffee?’. Try asking ‘Do you want to wear this white dress or this blue one? You’ll be amazed at how easy they’ll be able to answer compared to hanging questions.
  7. Don’t call them ‘dear, honey, love’ or anything other than their name. Dementia patients are still human and they are emotional beings, though sometimes trapped in a vegetative state or seem to be robots. Calling them by their own name keeps their dignity intact. It shows that you respect them despite their condition and it helps in their concentration and memory as well. So skip using words like ‘love’, ‘honey’ and ‘dear’ that patronizes people living with dementia. Don’t talk to them using ‘elderspeak’ which can cause seniors to feel uncomfortable, infantilized, and pitied. These words may sound condescending rather than a term for endearment.
  8. Don’t ask your parent, ‘Do you recognize me? While it can be frustrating when your parent with dementia doesn’t recognize you…just imagine how stressful it is for them. When you ask the person that question, it can make them feel guilty if they can’t remember, or offended if they do. You may want to avoid sudden bursts of emotions that might get them upset over something they forgot. It may help if you try to say your name and hug them instead. It’s also worth taking note to make sure you have eye-to-eye contact whenever you talk to your parent, as this establishes sincerity and trust.
  9. Practice “Listening,” a long time if necessary! Let your loved one express his or her thoughts and feelings, don’t interrupt them at the spur of the moment or while they talk. Just let them take their time and listen to them intently. Find out the emotions behind his or her agitation. Dig deeper into why he or she is upset, and do calm them by redirecting their attention to other things. But don’t force it, take a break and then try again after a good 10-15 minutes to take their mind off of the previous subject matter.

    Listen more than you talk. A good idea in almost any situation and particularly useful when with your parents. How will you know what is bothering them (and making them stubborn) if you don’t listen, no matter how trivial the conversation? They may be trying to tell you something without telling you. Sometimes you’ll have to read between the lines.”—Trick and Tips For Dealing with Stubbornness In Seniors, Assisted Senior Living.
  10. Smile often at people and parents with dementia.The smile! Without a single spoken word, smiling speaks volumes. Our facial expressions convey emotions and feelings that transcend language. Regardless of where you’re from or what language you speak, a smile is universally understood.”—Elaine C. Pereira, MA OTR/L CDP CDC – author, speaker, certified dementia practitioner, and caregiver.

~ ~ ~ § ~ ~ ~

Not all ten tips are easy to implement in a night, are they? During these last two years and more so last 4-months, I’ve learned I am by no means alone with this sort of parental dynamic. In fact, the U.S. has one of the largest geriatric populations in the world by comparison. The support networks are available. One is right here in Kerrville. I am utilizing them for sure. I must in order to maintain a stable demeanor and sanity. Hahaha. 😉

I hope some of this post, information, tips, encouragement, do’s and don’ts, may help others out there to cope as best as family members can with this/these diseases: Dementia and Alzheimer’s. That’s my hope anyway, not just to vent or whine. Let me know if you can relate, or might be in a similar situation with your parent(s). Maybe we could swap ideas and tips, yes?

Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always

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Black Swans

I learned a new definition and tag the other day: “Black Swan.”


What is a Black Swan? As best as I can decipher a Black Swan has three attributes:

  1. The event is unpredictable (to the observer).
  2. The event has widespread ramifications.
  3. After the event has occurred, people will assert that it was indeed explainable and predictable (hindsight bias).

These three Black Swan components can comprise a positive or negative consequence, or both. But it is primarily the second component that makes the event historic for the ages.

The origin of the term “black swan” in order to characterize such events I found intriguing. Prior to 1697, not one Western civilization country had observed any black swans in existence. This gave rise to the blind notion that such creatures just didn’t exist. Hence, the term became used to describe situations of impossibility and in my own estimation, egocentric innocence.1 And then it happened.

After a black swan was indeed observed in western Australia in 1697, the egocentric innocent assumption was disproved. Since then, “black swan” now describes situations where (premature) perceived impossibilities have later been disproven and those false egocentric paradigms have been shattered. Thank goodness for elapsed time and losing our supposed, imposed innocence.

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

And Robert Browning called it “sin.”

There are many Black Swan events throughout human history, more than you might think or that you were unaware of or not privy to and as it were was classified as “Strategic Subterfuge” by higher powers. The latter is much more prevalent than one might imagine. Some examples include:

  • Rise of the internet
  • The personal computer
  • The Georgia (1829) to the Black Hills (1874) Gold Rushes and others
  • Battle of Little Big Horn
  • World War I
  • Discovery of fossil fuels then electricity and AC vs. DC
  • Discovery of nuclear fission
  • The dissolution of the Soviet Union in 1991 or
  • The collapse of Spain’s global Empire over the 18th- and 19th-centuries
  • The 15th-century Columbian Exchange
  • The September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on targets in the U.S.
  • COVID-2019

The inventor of the term “Black Swan,” Nassim N. Taleb, underscores the point that the black swan event depends upon the observer. A Thanksgiving turkey sees its demise as a black swan, but the butcher and guests dining do not.

It’s important to draw the distinction between a black swan event and a crisis. Not all black swan events are crises, any lottery winner will attest to that. And not all crises are black swan events. Terrorist attacks are an almost daily occurrence worldwide, but the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001 were of unprecedented magnitude and unpredictability, hence their characterization as a black swan. Additionally, I have included COVID-19 because it meets all three criteria for being a Black Swan event. Yes, its ramifications are just as widespread as other black swan events and in hindsight it was obviously predictable and quite explainable; by all reputable, established, global medical experts. COVID-19 only became a global pandemic, especially lethal inside nations of defiant egocentric ignorance, and without question clearly fulfilling criteria #2 above as a direct result of defiant sectors of the human population. The fact that this pandemic is still not under control and behind us can only be blamed on our chosen, willing defiance and ignorance.

However, Mr. Taleb disagrees with me and anyone else calling COVID-19 a Black Swan. You can read his argument in The New Yorker entitled The Pandemic Isn’t A Black Swan But A Portent of A More Fragile Global System. It is an excellent article that I recommend reading. Though Taleb disagrees the pandemic is a black swan, he is correct in pointing out that there are clear reasons why humanity, nations, and governments are all too often repeatedly unprepared for them. This denial or chosen innocence/ignorance by populations gives more credence to the above framed quote on how costly the chosen apathetic mindset becomes.

Moving along now to the distant history in the ancient Levant.

~ ~ ~ § ~ ~ ~

I want to add another Black Swan event to the list that many in the Western Hemisphere and the U.S. will want to take exception. What is it? In a word: Christianity. Several of my regular blog followers will have a general idea as to how and why I add 4th-century CE (and after) Christianity. You’ve read enough of my blog-posts over these last 10-years to know how and why I would label it as a firm, strong holder of being a Black Swan. Listing all the verified, contextual evidence as well as the likely plausible conclusions based upon the said exhaustive interdisciplinary components, it is in my mind without question a Black Swan. Specifically the event? The 17-year disappearance of Yeshua bar Yosef from the Greco-Roman—not the Jewish account, but the Roman—canonized New Testament. This event caused and causes an entire host of many further problematic ripple-effects fragmenting and eventually destroying Christendom’s veracity.

If you did not know about or had not heard of a Black Swan event as I had not, now you know. What are some Black Swans you can recall or comprise as one? Feel free to share them below!


Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always

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Oldest Profession in History


This will (hopefully?) be one of my shortest blog-posts in a long while. Yeah, yeah, I can hear some of my regular Followers laughing, Pffft-ing, rolling their eyes, and tossing bouquets of flowers to me on stage for my acting/writing performance of not just lying through my teeth, but flowering me about my illusions of grandeur thinking I could actually write a brief, quick blog-post. Touché. You might win. But I’m going to try. Show your kind approval and praise if I pull it off, will ya? 😉

Yesterday evening I put in a pickup order at a nearby taco-texmex restaurant that is literally 130-yards away from my complex. It’s quick and easy. It’s also a fairly popular mid-range, affordable, family restaurant chain. I was about 5-10 minutes early picking up my dinner (6:00pm). While waiting at the counter, grabbing some lime-wedges to go with my delicious Modelo Negra beers at the self-serve drinks, ice, straws, napkins, etc, wall a STUNNING curly-haired blonde, hair up in a twisty, tight black shorts, summer cork heels, and tight black halter-top, no bra because she was quite endowed and full in the bust-size… walked by, out the front door, past the two gentlemen outside with their survey-stand—for the restaurant or the strip-mall, I wasn’t sure—who couldn’t stop gawking at her as she went by and stepped into her parked navy blue or black Jeep Cherokee for something. I thought she was leaving.

Nope, after about 30-40 seconds she got out and walked back into the restaurant, by the two men again, and down the long walkway in the middle of booths/tables, and to the back near and across from the men’s and women’s restrooms. She rejoined her equally stunning dark brunette lady-friend(?) or dinner companion. She stood up, my breathing paused, and was wearing a skin-tight workout, black with blue accents (in “key places”) shorts and spandex top, also accentuating her model-esque voluptuous physique. Yes, needless to say OR to expound upon they were both hubba-hubba. Your powers of deduction are correct reading what I’m explicitly and implicitly saying and can continue on your own! I mean, everyone in the restaurant would watch them as they moved around, especially the men, much longer than the women inside, patrons or staff. I tried to not be obvious. HAH!

Within 1-2 minutes of those Lookers rejoining each other at their back booth, a young man, say late twenties, early thirties in a tight workout tank-top showing off his finely sculpted neck, shoulders, biceps, triceps, tatted-up, and most likely well-defined abs underneath walked across the entire glass window-front of the taco eatery, pulled open the door and entered. I thought to myself as I watched him, Is there a gym, yoga, boxing club in this strip-mall? No, of course not. The entire strip-mall, every single place of business was already leased. Has been for a long time. Then, instead of walking through the ordering or pickup line as I had done, that very buffed man, glued to his cell-phone as he walked by outside and now inside… went straight to the back where the two super hawt women were sitting. They began to chat, quietly, as if they had been friends for years.

Ahhh, then it all clicked. Everything made sense.

I chuckled at myself and did a mental pat-on-my-back for NOT being glaringly obvious I was taken by and intrigued(?) by the blonde I had seen first. Okay, VERY intrigued. When I was in my youth, I would have been a very gullible, horny Neanderthal boy. I readily admit it. But many life-lessons of love and eros—often not simultaneously I should confess—have since paid off for me. Saved me in some instances. Plus, at my heightened age and wisdom now, I have learned and mastered my healthy, jacked-up blood-flow that once emptied my cranium and flooded south, engorging my groins, thus incapacitating my broader, smarter, more patient cerebral cortex while ignoring the opposite, more primal creative fun cortex, which seemed to be way south. Today, these random encounters of thick eros oozing everywhere, no longer have the kryptonite impact on me they once possessed. It all strokes my ego a tiny bit, makes me proud of my maturity and wisdom presently! It’s damn near foolproof—but I’ve also learned Never say never.

As I walked out of the restaurant with my food and beers back to my residential complex, one of the earlier gentlemen outside the door there (in his 40’s or so) looked at me, I acknowledged him chuckling and said:

“I’ve rarely witnessed “female solicitation” that was so blatant, let alone when their “business manager” walks in and doesn’t bother to be discreet, glued to his phone, and sits with his two staffers, workers, I’ll say Courtesans, and all three of them pretend they own the restaurant.”

The surveyor gentleman replied “Yeah, blatant for sure, huh? It’s the oldest profession in history.

I laughed in agreement and returned a similar sentiment:

“Yep, and not that I have ever thought prostitution should be illegal. It shouldn’t at all! One way or another, we all pay for what we want; monetarily and otherwise.”

He laughed and we parted ways. I heard him say from around the corner “Ain’t that true!

Here’s my rub on life’s most ancient profession—the genders, orientations today don’t matter. Many people are more than willing to throw down loads of cash, credit, assets, emotional investment, whatever it is for that long-term, mid-term, or short-term feeling, dopamine fix all the time. Neurologically human nature will not change for many a millenia. But today, in a conservative, semi-pious or hyper-uptight pious society? There are pros and cons any way you examine it.

Legally, under our county/state marriages and family law, it costs us an insane amount, much more on all levels than you could imagine!!! That might be just fine, but it doesn’t disprove my intimate understanding of human eros and love. Some romantic relationships are great investments with very acceptable ROI’s. Others? Eh, not so much. And some are down right horrific, nasty, and disastrous in divorce court—children aside or not. Am I right or am I very right? Perhaps it is time for human society to evolve more? Be stronger and know we can learn from mistakes of the heart, mind, and the libido, huh? 😉 😛

I welcome any and all feedback, as usual. Just remember, good etiquette and be a little open-minded. A GREAT sense of humor is most definitely encouraged!


Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always

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A Fall Day at the Arboretum

Thursday, Nov. 12th, Qin and I took a much needed morning and afternoon to stroll lazily through the Dallas Arboretum and Botanical Garden. We did strictly observe, of course, all necessary COVID-19 protocols for health and safety, not just for ourselves, but for all other park guests as well. It was tricky sometimes to keep 6-8 feet away on a few narrow bridges and pathways, but we did the best we could. Yes, there were a couple of occasions where other park guests were oblivious to how exactly 6-feet measures out—they seemed to ridiculously think it was 2-3 feet—and two park workers who thought it was 1-2 feet and supposedly no mask was required for one grounds-keeper. Hence, due to continued negligence by others our visit was not entirely tranquil nor altogether safe.

Arboretum Main Entrance in Spring time 2004

If the park wants to stay open for reasons of profit and revenues, then its authorities really must employ a regiment of security-like roaming guards monitoring guests’ compliance to safety measures. I am also quiet sure the 66-acre park (0.267 sq. km) allowed too many paying guests inside. This was hugely disappointing and shocking. I guess it doesn’t matter because over 73.6 million Americans voted Nov. 3rd for an incumbent of sheer ignorance, sheer denial, and subhuman wanting more and more needless deaths. But enough talk about our out-of-control pandemic and suffering; unimportant right? 😟 Let’s move on to the beauty and splendor of our planet and these botanical gardens shall we.

Qin and I brought along a cooler of Fuji apple slices and fresh-cut pineapple wedges for a noonday snack. Qin toted her thermos of freshly boiled (sterilized) water—a lifelong habit she formed when growing up and living in China. Not that she needs to do it in Dallas, but it’s a habit of comfort for her. I don’t mind. I find it exceedingly safe and charming. 😋

When we reached our designated parking lot and Gate-number, showed our prearranged, electronic time-slot admission receipt, we began the morning stroll and tour of this award-winning Arboretum. It would be a 4-hour respite from 12-days of self-appointed “Stay Home” orders, not to mention for the sake of our mental well-being on top of 10-months plus COVID-19 fatigue. We began at the organic restaurant A Tasteful Place, The Edible Verdant and Scenic Overlook (see below).

As we wound our way out and to the three nearby large lawns and beds of the Jonsson Color Gardens, a challenge was made. We both agreed to have a photo competition: Who could capture on our phones the best images and videos of our Arboretum Day. We wanted you readers to vote on the five images you like most. But before I get to those photos, I created a 6-minute video highlight of our day:

Making our way to the second lawn and bed Qin takes a cozy sit next to William Shakespeare on his bronze writing bench, “你好,威利。” (Nǐ hǎo, wēi lì. or Hello Willy). With a stiff grin and the usual iambic pentameter Willy answers:

That time of year thou mayst in me behold
When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang
Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,
Bare ruin’d choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.

William Shakespeare – Sonnet 73

Ladies and Gents, time for the contest and collection of images we captured. Now here’s the rub. We have a total of 29 images. Obviously, I could not put each photo into the post-content; your loading time for the page probably would’ve lasted a snail’s pace 5-7 minutes depending on your connection, right? I did not want to torture you all. 😉 If I had tortured you that way, then you could’ve just clicked on a “Thumbs up” button “👍” on each photo to vote on your favorite five images. That would’ve been most convenient for voting, I know. But I had to make a choice: A) torture all of you with a slow page-loading time, or B) fast page-load, jot down your favorite five photos, and put them in your comment at the bottom. I went with the latter. I hope you agree with my decision.

Therefore, as you are going through the images below, at the bottom-left is the photo number, e.g. #1, #9, and so on. Make a note of the number, collect your FIVE (5) favorites, and leave a comment at the bottom with your selections. After a few weeks, with your help, we’ll see who wins the photo challenge, Qin or me, the Professor. At that time I’ll post and reply to all you wonderful participants as to who won the Fall Day at the Arboretum Contest. Good? Good. Thank you for your understanding! Now, off you go with your votes please!

Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always — Wear A Mask!

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