At first they dug with picks, and then the great
steam drills were made. The navvies, who had carved
their way through living rock, sickened or starved
or died of bends. The bubbles percolateto heart or brain; you die. Not soon enough,
The engineers and stokers died as well.
They might as well have tunnelled into Hell.
The bubbles came for them. Not only roughworkers by hand die at those depths; the brains
of scientists who tried to work out why
exploded too. They came back, saw the sky
and felt the pangs of death. These days the trainsare pressurized. Unharmed we make our way
from London to New York in just one day.— Roz Kaveney, Steampunk Sonnets
It has been some time since last I posted about Steampunk, my fond alternative dimension of life. I have neglected the neo-vintage, quirky, dashing artforms, imaginative gadgets, and ingenious bits-n-bobs far too long. For this I present to you today more marvels in Steampunk pageantry.
On this occasion we will read Steam-sonnets by Madame Kaveney, gaze in wonderment over a menagerie of Steampunk instruments, engines, and craftsmanship—in particular a certain renown submarine with a twist. And I’d be amiss should this tour proceed without tunes of revolutionary movements and social reforms upholding neo-Bohemian melodies and harmonies performed by Abney Park and the now retired Doctor Phineas Waldolf Steel. Should you still be unsatisfied a stop at an extraordinary cafè in Cape Town, South Africa that serves-up dreamy crumpets, tea, and java for any who enter craving. With a smile they serve travelers of modern-mediocrity or flamboyant Steampunkers alike. All the same, let’s begin first with the wacky gadgets and mechanized mobilities. The following slideshow are actual, real-life functional Steampunk items and machines:
Should you be a wine connoisseur extraordinaire, the lover and aficionado of make-the-machines-do-it as gentry Victorians would’ve done, then this contraption is a must in your saloon. Have a look at this thingamajig that does everything except select your wine of choice.
Lost your corkscrew? Can’t seem to summon your Sommelier? No worries, here’s how to impress your evening guests with flair, or reveal just how much you cannot be bothered by mundane tasks of bottle-opening and filling glasses. Pfffttt, such behavior is for peasants and servants:
∼ ∼ ∼ § ∼ ∼ ∼
They started him on messages; he’d go
on roller-skates down the long corridor
with windows to the engine. It was more
than he could take in, but he came to knowit first by all its parts—the cogs and gears,
the pistons and the loom that read each card.
It was the computation he found hard
but learned its pounding rhythms down the years.He’d moved from skates to oil-can, then to run
the simpler programmes, then to write his own,
and then to oversee. He’d sometimes moan
in sleep, as if he felt a throbbing tonof metal in his brain. He lost his sight
and hearing, as the numbers grew more bright.— Roz Kaveney, Steampunk Sonnets
‘He envisions a world where the only obligation of the people is to have fun… It all comes down to having fun. We spend our lives trapped,’ voices zany Dr. Steel, ‘when all we really want to do is play. So, let the people play! Let us build a Utopian Playland.’
Rudyard Kipling in 1915 wrote “The Fringes of the Fleet” and a year later composer Edward Elgar penned musical songs about the Tin Fish, or submarines. It goes:
They bear, in place of classic names,
Letters and numbers on their skin.
They play their grisly blindfold games
In little boxes made of tin.
However, engineers at Five Ton Crane Arts along with Christopher Bently and Sean Orlando had a different vessel in mind: The Nautilus Terra-firma Submarine Car. She weighs in at 11,000 lbs. dry and has a top-speed of 13 mph. From bow to stern she’s 25-feet and 100-inches from port to starboard, and stands a proud 11-feet 6-inches without canopy (see below slideshow). Aboard ship she’s fully equipped with:
- Harpoon gun water cannon (13 gallons per minute)
- Hydraulic drive controls
- GPS navigation and Pro-audio sound
- LED RGB programmable lighting system
- Library
- Specimen lab
- Navigation room
- Night vision periscope
- Poop deck with custom shade canopy… and yes,
- Air conditioning
Though some may carry doubts that the Age of Steampunk has seen its last days and appeal, yet there are far many who yell Nah! Surviving musicians of the HMS Ophelia, a clockwork guitarist, two belly dancers, a flintlock bassist, a Middle-Eastern percussionist, a contorting violent violinist, and a Tesla-powered keyboardist sing and perform:
Your subculture shops at the mall
We build ours with blowtorch, needle, thread, and leather awl
With our antique clock parts we’ve taken all arts, fine art to fashion
And now we’re spreading worldwide to circle the globe with a furious passionOut with the new
In with the old
Out with the new
In with the old
— Steampunk Revolution by Abney Park
Should your zeppelin or land-craft malfunction, snap a cog, or run aground in the southern most portion of the African continent, make haste to Cape Town, South Africa. There you will detect friends, dazzling decor, smells and nourishment that comes only from the realm, the timeless culture of exquisite Steampunkery at Truth Cafè. If you care to peruse their daytime Brasserie Menu or curious of their After Dark menu, click-on said links.
Truth Coffee & Cafe – Cape Town, SA
One online media agency reported on Cape Town’s most radically themed shop and cafè writing:
Every inch of the coffee shop is packed with visual candy from large saw-blade tabletops to beautiful overstuffed booths and an ornate array of coffee making equipment that looks absurdly complex, almost like interior of a World War 2 submarine. If that wasn’t enough, Martin also crammed the space with vintage typewriters, Singer sewing machines, and old candlestick telephones. The design even extends to the restrooms which have exposed copper pipes, old extending mirrors and Victorian tap levers.
— “Step Inside ‘Truth,’ a Steampunk Coffee Shop,” ThisIsColossal.com accessed Dec. 10, 2019
Being a romantic of retro-futuristic steam-powered gadgets and aesthetics myself, feast your eyes and appetite upon Truth Cafè’s surreal interior in Steampunk design. See if you agree—Haldane-Martin Designs, photos – Micky Hoyle.
∼ ∼ ∼ § ∼ ∼ ∼
The stokeress had washed her sooty face
And wore her best bandana round a neck
Scrubbed almost white. She took a turn on deck,
Chatted to a lieutenant. Knew her placeBut flirted anyway. He took her to
The magic lantern show and kissed her hand
On parting. And she dreamed how he would stand
Outside her cabin door, and bring the shoeShe had not left behind. Awoke to spend
Her days in shovelling, and dust, and grime,
Her nights exhausted. Found her life sublime
To serve the great machine, and sometimes mendRips in the fabric of its bag, look down
At Delhi, Boston, Prague and London Town.— Roz Kaveney, Steampunk Sonnets
If you have not yet journeyed to my other Steampunk blog-posts, below is a quick list of links. There’s also a dedicated Menu up top along my green-barred header. You can’t miss it.
Steampunkery Marvels – The park of magical zoological encounters from the imaginations of Jules Verne intertwined with the mechanized creations of Leonardo da Vinci is the Les Machines de L’ile.
The A-C of Steampunk – A look forward and backward at the contraptions of today’s Steampunk sub-culture.
Living Steampunk – Modern urban living meets Jules Verne and Captain Nemo — see the Chelsea apartment in NYC.
Through the Monocles – A photomontage to satisfy the most curious with music by KK and The Steampunk Orchestra.
Pure Steampunk – Art Donovan and his lighting company have given the Steampunk movement another electric jolt of popularity!
————
Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always
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has been described as a park of magical zoological encounters from the imaginations of Jules Verne mixed with the mechanized creations of Leonardo da Vinci animated on the grounds and shipyards of Nantes’ 19th century maritime industry. I have to agree. The Machines of the Isle of Nantes, in western France are marvels to behold and will certainly be part of my next European visit.
his four-story mechanical mammoth ushers visitors to and from the craftsmen’s warehouse and the park’s Carousel. Getting onto the great Elephant’s decked back under the ivory-colored elliptic umbrella, it is impossible to overlook the ornate hand-carved woodwork which make its skin. Descend into the Elephant’s torso and belly and you are surrounded by pneumatic switches clattering to-and-fro across a network of cables and tubes (the heart) setting the beast in motion. During every journey the trunk blows water over entranced spectators and laughing children followed by trumpets calling and warning — with the help of dials, pipes, horns, and clever hands of its operator — who and what is coming.
nderneath the large hangers lies a tropical garden called La Galerie des Machines. Here with a handtouch or move of levers various large reptiles, sea creatures, and insects come alive. There is a giant ant, sea turtle, caterpillar, crab, a ferocious anglerfish, enormous spider, serpent, and up above a wall-to-wall giant heron flying visitors in wicker-baskets from one end of the hanger to the other. Pay close attention to all the botanical plants because little distinguishes the organic from the mechanical until they catch you by surprise!
rojected to be complete in 2021 is the budding Arbre aux Hérons, or Heron Tree. This magnificent tree will extend a full 35-meters in height, 50-meters in diameter, with branches 20-meters long providing a canopy over the Gift Shop and Café below. When complete, visitors will be able to take circular flights underneath the two heron’s wings above the tree branches. Already the tree carries a variety of real plants on each finished limbs and visitors can walk atop branches reaching the bar and shop in multiple ways that would make even the 
urther outside on the grounds is the three-leveled carnival-like carousel for children under 12-years of age. The Carrousel des mondes Marins (Marine Worlds Carousel) exhibits an enchanting fauna of every oceanic creature imaginable. Rather than the traditional 
horses, carriages, or teacups, children may choose rides inside or atop a mechanical aquarium of bizarre crabs, shrimp, an octopus, fish such as a puffer fish, strange serpents and sea turtles. All the moving parts are enough to entrance and captivate your kids for minutes on end. On the very top of the Carousel are ornate pediments and 16 fishermen guarding the world’s precious oceans. The seabed, the abyss, and the ocean surface makeup the three-tiered marine life. A giant crab, reverse propulsion squid, a Nautilus-like diving Machine exploring the depths, the Bathyscaphe which climbs up and down the central mast, and the newest arrival the Boxy Fish comprise part of The Seabed’s 14 moving elements. Along The Abyss (middle level) one will discover the Manta Ray, Pirate-fish, and Deep-sea Lanternfish among three other creatures. Up on the Ocean Surface are the swaying boats, harnessed Flying fish, a storm boat, Nutshells and Jellyfish all swimming within a whirlpool of 24 mechanical waves.
limbing to the top floor of the varied hangers, visitors can gaze down upon the work areas and laboratories of Company La Machine, glimpsing the park’s future spectacles. Watching these fantastic craftsmen ply their trade you see the unbelievable care and detail that goes into every new and upcoming creature. From François Delarozière’s mind, to these worker’s hands and tools, come the mechanical inventions of Da Vinci and Verne reincarnated. New wacky unusual machines and rides are designed and fabricated every year keeping the theme park virtually newfangled.
ne of the delights of the park is the total freedom to explore every site and nook at your own pace. The Café de la Branche offers different beverages, snacks, sandwiches, and tasty pastries to enjoy underneath The Heron Tree’s foliage. Your appetite can be appeased with the chef’s Back From the Market menu which includes a choice of fish, a traditional dish or grilled meat, as well as homemade pies. Over weekends, depending on the season, patrons can enjoy: homemade quiche, fresh vegetable soup, meal-sized salads, as well as homemade sandwiches. Hot dogs and panini sandwiches are available in the summer. For a four o’clock coffee break, muffins, brownies, shortbread, or donuts are on the menu. Regional and locally crafted specialities of beer, wines, and ciders can be purchased too.
The Professor's Convatorium 
