Larger Little Gifts

I should be posting my final part to my Untapped Worlds series because it is three-quarters finished. But to me this quick post takes more precedence.

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There’s a cliché, an adage that says “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” Life has firmly taught me that this cliché is not a very wise outlook. In fact, the better outlook is “Damn well better look in the horses’ mouth! In fact, take it to the nearest orthodontist and get full x-rays and cleanings because some or many of those teeth and gums could be wooden, abscessed, and outright dentures or implants! While at it take it to the best veterinarian too!” Hah!

And then there are those rare moments like I had late last night when the one thing I THOUGHT wouldn’t couldn’t happen, happened. Actually it was two Larger Little Gifts.

The first gift was a voicemail from a job position I had applied for many weeks ago with the local VA in association with the state hospital. I am extremely qualified for this Nurses Assistant opening AND have all the necessary background to be superb at it. In fact, I’m overqualified given my background and work-experience. The REAL position I want is helping families of veterans with PTSD and other psychological issues and their dynamics within families of returned, wounded or otherwise, veterans. I am just a semester or two away from completing my Masters degree from 1991 in psychology, addiction, and counseling/therapy. This is all that stands in the way of an approved state license and better pay (relatively speaking) than continuing as a Special Ed teacher in Texas. This voicemail made me jump up and down pumping my fist hard as if I just saved a shot to the upper-90 in the dying injury/extra minutes of the World Cup Final to preserve our win! I’m not sure even that fully describes my elation. If I get an actual face-to-face interview(?), I am SO in. 😀

Laughing coupleThe second but easily the larger little gift was from a long-time online-dating interest who I had thought wasn’t real. In fact, many profiles on most all ‘dating sites’ are fake; fake pictures, no pictures at all, short cookie-cutter self-descriptions and their “criteria” for a dream partner/spouse. Then there are the marketing methods to keep you on the website without actually ever talking live or meeting anyone, i.e. contact-info-forbidden instructions and restrictions. This method gets more money out of you. If someone does chat with you, many fake profiles try to bait-you over to their website they’ve been paid a fee to ‘recruit’ you away. The 5-6 dating-sites I’ve been a past member, these business and ‘member’ practices are to be expected — afterall, “love” is a multi-million dollar growing business. Cha-ching!

But this one woman’s profile was different, very different. Yes she had some 5-7 very recent photos AND unique clever descriptions I’ve never read in my 13-years of online-dating sites! She was extraordinary! No, check that; my first impression was “way too good to be true.” Wow, was I wrong.

When she eventually responded to my interests and my introductory email, I knew instantly by the way she wrote… “This was a winner.” After only 4-5 HILARIOUS email exchanges thru the site… we were both begging each other to get on the phone together. When we did, after only 5-10 minutes I knew instantly in my 36-years of dating, relationships, and two marriages/divorces… this one is like no other, hands down.

We talked EASILY near 3-hours as if we’d come from the same families, areas, travels, and values. Damn near identical. She wanted to know much more about me and I her. She got it; everything, no holes barred from me because she was sick-n-tired of the artificial B.S. on many dating websites — hit repeat. Twice she told me to lay it on, all of it, and followed with ‘dear God this is so refreshing!‘ We both laughed knowing we both understood; like identical twins we got it. We’ve both lived it so long. No full locked-up closets between us! She cleaned house on me! It was SPECTACULAR! I was so freaking giddy last night I couldn’t sleep fast enough to shoot a little text-message this morning how much I thoroughly enjoyed our too brief 3-hour talk! HAH! I wasn’t quick enough!

At 7:40am I get a text-message from her. Want to know what she told me?

Bwahahaha! Right. It’s none of your business! But stay tuned if you like. This journey/story is guaranteed to be a great ride!

Score a point for the VA. Ding. Score game-winner for serendipitous surprises! 🙂

Live Well — Love Much — Laugh Often — Learn Always

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Not What Was Promised!

It's a Love Extravaganza?

Monica has become a new weekly patron of the quaint Pink Elephant Pub & Grill.  She is not a runway model, but she has a glowing smile, shapely and proportioned figure, and a big heart that compliments nicely her generous natural breasts.  Socially adept Monica seems to make new friends quite easily.

She decided it was time to join the very popular online dating website  Afterall, Monica’s internal clock is ticking a tad faster at 27 and her mother and older married sisters remind her of this all too often.  Besides, this website GUARANTEES LOVE on 339 different levels!  Monica thinks, “Wow!  This has to work!  It is at least worth a try for a couple of months.”

Very excited, Monica spends more and more time on the website.  Day after day she receives “match” after match of “highly potential” soul mates!  She had no idea that love was so easy, let alone so available!  In a three-week period Monica meets about 30 “perfect” partners for a drink at her now favorite bar down the street.  With heightened expectations Monica feels this one might have serious potential!  He pulls out her chair affirming her early desires.

Shortly after their first exchanges the manager-owner of The Pink Elephant approaches and politely informs Monica and her date that they will have to leave.  Both of them taken aback, Monica asks why?  “I have been a regular here for over a month!”  As firmly and discreetly as he knew how, the manger replies, “I’m sorry Ma’am, but The Pink Elephant is not a place for women-of-the-night doing business with their…. clients.”

Before Monica could finish her question, she turned to her now standing date and stood as well asking if he wanted to go somewhere else?

No Love, I will be on my way” and quickly made his exit.  Another man sitting at a nearby bar stool within earshot came over.  “Hi!  I would…” and before the suave man could continue Monica slapped his cheek and stormed out furious!

The moral of this story?  In online dating, be careful what you wish for!  — Professor Taboo wink & grin!


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