Of Envy and Its Guises

Posted on May 23, 2013 by Professor Taboo

According to Webster’s New World College Dictionary, envy is defined as 1. a feeling of discontent and ill-will because of another’s advantages, possessions, etc.; resentful dislike of another who has something that one desires. 2. desire for some advantage, quality, etc. that another has. 3. an object of envious feeling; and so on as described in the definition. I have a particular interest in number two: “desire for some advantage, quality… that another has.”

As I wrote about in my previous post She Was A Knockout, I have been visiting my new orthodontist for major dental work. My orthodontist is a very pleasant, kind, engaging man in his late sixties and probably on the verge of his retirement. In fact, after he is finished with me I am sure he could easily retire!

You might already know, Texas is considered on the fringe of the southern bible-belt. In some places – like this small southwest Texan town I’m temporarily in – at times you’d think it was firmly in the deep ultra-conservative south. Everyone knows everyone according to two badges: what 1,000 acre ranch you own or its family you hale from, and what Christian church you attend. With those badges come the assumption that on either Saturday afternoon/evening, or Sunday morning, you along with everyone else in town are sitting in a pew; when you’re not in the pew then you are “spreading the Good News!” during the other remaining six days or at least talking about how great the “news” and life is…or I should say, reborn life.

All throughout his office and patient rooms are table-top statues (image above) with no inscriptions but which clearly depict a familiar scene and New Testament story: Mary the prostitute or a disciple kneeling down washing Christ’s feet. Up on several walls and on several counters are negative (as opposed to photographic positive) shapes that when closely examined spell “Jesus.”

I am humored by his obvious proclamations. After all, it is his office and patient rooms…..that he leases from the property management and owners. And he and his practice, fortunately for him, do reside in a country of religious freedom and speech. Like him, I am certainly grateful for that privilege. I smile thinking that as his paying patient, I must represent Jesus in those statues! Oh no, wait a minute! Could I be the prostitute, or rather gigolo paying my growing dental bill in whatever manner works!? I could easily be enslaved to my dentist for several years after all the services rendered!

Like Penis-Envy But Really God-Envy

A submissive gladly shows service to her Dom/Master

On that note, I have this itching urge to share another interpretation of those many statuettes thoughtfully placed in each of their locations. It is this: Did you know that this statue also symbolizes the servitude of a submissive to their Dom, Domme, or Master in the BDSM lifestyle? I chuckle inside imagining their expressions. And then my warped sense of humor whispers to me: this is like penis-envy, except in this office it is God-envy. I realize my itching ill-expressed humor might exact many more extractions of teeth if I don’t guard my tongue. I repress.

So you might be asking, what does this have to do with envy? Bear with me.

As my dentist popped his rubber gloves to work inside my mouth, we got sidetracked by my curiosity to his two digital clocks in the room. I explained to him (with intended humor) the big one displayed the room temperature, barometric pressure, and weirdly 6:35pm Sunday. That cannot be so because my appointment was for 8:30am Monday; I was on time. Furthermore, there is no place on Earth where it was presently 6:37pm Sunday…so I ask you Dr. Einstein – that is the name I’ll give him here to protect his innocence – have you invented a patient room and chair capable of time-travel? He played along.

But then our conversation turned. He mentioned that my astrological sign/reading for the day might be treacherous (being in his office laid back in the chair) as he smirked. And before I could play along with his wit, he quickly retracted his comment apologizing for mocking a system that is “a bunch of hogwash” and that he doesn’t believe in any of that stuff. Then he continued, “That stuff [astrology] is demonic!” And then he quickly apologized again and stated he should not have said that either because I might like it or believe in it!

Now I’m really enjoying The Orthodontic Squirm Show! And then he digs his hole deeper and asks me “Do you like that stuff? Do you believe it?”

Let me say here, that earlier itch on his statuettes, never wanted to be scratched SO BAD as it did with that question!

Given my situation and trust in his upcoming surgical expertise with my mouth and teeth, I answered, I love space exploration, cosmology, astrophysics, and quantum mechanics. He replied “But that has nothing to do with astrology.” I know it doesn’t I answered. I hoped he was witty enough to understand my read-between-the-lines answer. I was not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing one way or the other if his fumbling had been intrusive or not, even though it wasn’t in the least. But….Let him sweat!

* * * * * * * * * *

In almost every case, I have never been offended or put off by Christian evangelicals or proselytizing, or even self-perceived prophets. The kind folks that clutter their front yards with crosses representing Calvary don’t really bother me either. Having grown up in Texas, having spent two and a half years in seminary myself and four years at a Christian liberal arts college and then five years as a deacon and singles ministry leader all in Mississippi, I know the canonical New Testament teachings and doctrines very, very well. Those evangelicals, or proselytizers, or prophets, or simple common folk proclaiming Good News are actually obeying quite well what scripture teaches ALL followers to go and do…daily with humility. I greatly admire their obedience and courage even though I thoroughly disagree with their foundations for doing it.

So why do they do it?

In my mind and reasoning, they are unaware (or in denial) of how amputated, and how misconceived – and maligned through Greco-Roman lenses and traditions – the stories and passages of their bible was canonized versus the real historical events and context of their Savior Yeshua. Those historical facts are apparently boring and unnecessary. So I ask myself again, why do they do it so faithfully? Then the light bulb turns on. God-envy.

The human brain and body is a remarkable coping mechanism to the sometimes brutal unexplainable force of life. So we envy those who seem to lift themselves above the pain and chaos and offer a form of hope (and power?), peace, and order. Fortunately, there are a plethora of successful ways of achieving the happier life or a less anxiety-ridden life and subsequent conquest of death WITHOUT surrendering your soul and innate gifts to an ancient proxy shrouded in Greco-Roman traditions. In the doctrines of mainstream Christianity that “surrendering” is referred to as humanity’s total depravity.

Geocentrism/Egocentrism formerly taught by the Roman Church…which begat all later Christian churches today.

Consequently, and to humanity’s detriment for two plus millennia, mainstream Christian doctrines don’t teach self-reliance, self-empowerment or self-actualization because that was not the Greco-Roman way of control and imperialism during the formation of the canonical New Testament; so we envy its Messiah…a greatly diluted form of individual potential.

I wonder if my orthodontist knows that it is because of astrology and other fields of science that mankind successfully navigated the vast oceans, understood when crops needed to be planted and harvested, that the Earth circles the Sun and not the Sun/cosmos circling Man’s planet, or more importantly three Eastern Arabian kings bearing royal gifts followed a great Supernova in the night sky — which astrologers and cosmologists have determined was not in the month of December — with navigation built upon centuries of incredible Arabian-Persian science and astrology? What do you think?

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Footnote – If interested in the historical context of the Greco-Roman deification of Yeshua of Nazareth, start with my post Constantine: Christianity’s True Catalyst/Christ or the other The Suffering Messiah That Wasn’t Jesus. For further reading and understanding of Yeshua’s/Jesus’ deep Jewish-Roman world, I recommend Dr. James Tabor’s work and website at The Jewish Roman World of Jesus. It is an excellent highly informative site of overlooked context by today’s Roman Catholic and Protestant churches.

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This work by Professor Taboo is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License. Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at https://professortaboo.wordpress.com.

Sometimes

Posted on May 14, 2013 by Professor Taboo

Attaching music to a message is one great way to make that message stick and stick deep in the heart and soul. As I have been hearing and reading lately the news about equality for all American citizens of all races, religion, ethnicity, and ever so inevitably…gender and orientation — Minnesota being the latest — I thought of this artist and song. I think it (and feel it) very appropriate for these wonderful and right Winds of Change. This post is somewhat a continuation of the previous post: along the lines of genetic and hormonal development in all people.

I can only imagine how scary it must be and feel to be chastised for simply being biologically and neurologically different than the accepted norm since being in your mother’s womb; being different since your embryonic stage. What a sometimes hopeless feeling not to understand why so many people think you and/or call you inferior, sick, or worse a product of evil. In some homes growing up, the bitterness and shaming could even turn violent if a mother or father had a volatile temper. When I thoroughly imagine those horrid circumstances at home or in public, like at school, or possibly every corner you turn….it begins to enrage me against moronic uninformed uneducated bigotry; let alone a lack of compassion, understanding, and peaceful tolerance. Imagine a young child or teen not understanding their “unusual” feelings that seemingly NO ONE agrees with or condones. And perhaps they are always so ready to pound you into conformity for something which was firmly developed in your embryonic stage! If you would like to be quickly tutored on exactly what scientific medical research has been compiling for non-standardized gender relations….read my post Toss the 2-D Glasses. Meanwhile, listen, read the lyrics, and hopefully enjoy this relevant song “Sometimes” by the German band And One.

Daddy said that I’m a good boy
Caus I always did his will
But I can’t remember,
was it me – how did I feel
I call’em family,
but in the heart of hearts I know
There’s something wrong with me,
what can I do?

Mother said that I’m a good girl
I was always dressed to kill
But I can’t remember,
was it me – how did I feel
Now this is long ago
But today I’m really sure
I don’t wanna crawl no more
No I don’t want to

I want to be all alone
(to be all alone)
(leave me all alone)
(I’m so lonely)
Sometimes I don’t know what I prefer to be
That’s all that I can see

So I burnt down the house of hate
The key to close the door
What a nice September
I found out it’s not too late
Its happened yesterday
But today I’m really sure
I don’t wanna crawl no more
No I don’t want to

I want to be all alone
(to be all alone)
(leave me all alone)
(I’m so lonely)
Sometimes I don’t know what I prefer to be
That’s all that I can see

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DRD4-7R

Posted on May 11, 2013 by Professor Taboo

Orchid?

No, it is not a new type of iPhone, or video recorder, or measurement, or even the launch code for your nearby missile silo. Give up trying to guess what DRD4-7R is because it is so small, so tiny, that you will never touch it. It could be inferred that cats have it, but that assumption would fall short when they returned home, every time. No, it is not explicitly manifested in any animal on Earth and it cannot be found in any plant or stone. But it is indeed part of our human wiring.

Many times throughout my adult life I have asked myself Why am I so intrigued with new things, new places, new feelings, and new people? Why do I start to get restless over a long period of time seeking new adventures? I accepted long ago that I have this Marco Polo type personality; I love to inquire. I love to explore! Why? If you understand the purpose and nuances of goalkeepers in sports, like hockey or my lifetime sport soccer, then you’ll understand this one: why did I choose to, no persisted in playing the position of goalkeeper? What sane person wants objects hurled or kicked at them hard? Then the other day I read a fascinating article in the January 2013 issue of National Geographic magazine ironically asking and answering my same questions! This totally explains my addiction to everything National Geographic! More please! I read further. Ah, dopamine. It’s the dopamine! Hmm, duh.

Or dandelion?

For those of you with a slight variant of dopamine than perhaps I and others may have, dopamine “is a neurotransmitter that helps control the brain’s reward and pleasure centers. Dopamine also helps regulate movement and emotional responses, and it enables us not only to see rewards, but to take action to move toward them. Dopamine deficiency results in Parkinson’s Disease, and people with low dopamine activity may be more prone to addiction. The presence of a certain kind of dopamine receptor is also associated with sensation-seeking” according to Psychology Today. Not so coincidentally, though I am not an “addict,” several of my extended family members are addicts…as well as my sister. I guess I selfishly stole most of it from mother’s womb before my sister could snatch any. I know she’ll argue this, but I was always quicker than her! And not surprisingly, several laboratory studies in Europe, Israel, and the U.S. have found that a lack of the 7R variant is linked to depression or lower motivation. I found this result very interesting.

As I continued to read, in my mind all the dots — from the broad picture down to the microscopic — were connecting and making perfect sense; perfect harmony like a homecoming. But not permanent! A homecoming and going! And my fascination with bird cages — naturally with an open door or no door — now made sense too.

Orchids versus Dandelions

Am I an orchid thriving in stimulating environments, or am I a dandelion that manages to adapt and survive in harsh environments?

Perhaps the better question would be could there be hybrids of the two? David Dobbs has written several articles on this gene and the genetic-cultural roots of human temperament, and is the writer of this National Geographic article that has captivated me. He explains:

“If an urge to explore rises in us innately, perhaps its foundation lies within our genome. In fact, there is a mutation that pops up frequently in such discussions: a variant of a gene called DRD4, which helps control dopamine, a chemical brain messenger important in learning and reward. Researchers have repeatedly tied the variant, known as DRD4-7R and carried by roughly 20 percent of all humans, to curiosity and restlessness. Dozens of human studies have found that 7R makes people more likely to take risks; explore new places, ideas, foods, relationships [guilty in the 1st degree there!], drugs, or sexual opportunities [should I say it again?]; and generally embrace movement, change, and adventure. Studies in animals simulating 7R’s actions suggest it increases their taste for both movement and novelty. (Not incidentally, it is also closely associated with ADHD.)”

"Take one 10mg tablet once daily; for severe cases take with liquor in a Hazmet suit."

“Take one 10mg tablet once daily; for severe cases take with liquor in a Hazmat suit.”

In another March 2012 article on Wired.com, Dobbs further explains:

“This revisionist hypothesis is known variously as the sensitivity hypothesis, the differential susceptibility hypothesis, or the orchid-dandelion hypothesis — a term that Thomas Boyce and Bruce Ellis coined based on the vernacular Swedish term “dandelion children,” who seem to grow up okay in almost any environment; to that they added “orchid children,” who thrive under good care but wilt under bad. It is a young hypothesis, hatched 15 years ago and obscure for most of that time. But in the last two or three years it has gained enormous traction, spreading through behavioral genetics, child development, and anthropology.”

At this point in my reading and research I feel as if I’m reading parts of my biography or journal called This Is Who I Am and Why. It helps me at least process further and understand so many how’s and why’s, like Why have I been ~~single~~ unmarried most of my life? Have I not been hanging around long enough in the right flower or weed gardens!? Does this explain my need for Zyrtec at certain times and circumstances of the year! Geeezzzz. It does make sense: like a love-hate thing for the beauty of new outdoor places, but then you discover all the annoying bugs, insects, reptiles, and yes, inevitably Medusa! No, I’m kidding…..about nature’s creatures. Hah!

On a serious note however, geneticist are also associating the 7R variant, and another: the 2R, back to our ancient ancestors in Africa 70,000 – 50,000 years ago. For a quick tutorial read my post Our Family Reunion.

Anthropologists suggest that this minority of humans are the reason mankind migrated out of Africa; to find new sources of food and a different way of life. Scientist do know that astronauts or cosmonauts, or whatever title the sponsoring group bestows on their explorers/adventurers, 7R is definitely found in their genetic code. They are the risk-reward breed and today they are found in many walks of life. On a spectrum left to right 1 through 5, left being pure orchids (1)….right being pure dandelions (5), I am firmly a two if not one-and-a-half. I most definitely get restless after long periods of routine. I am not saying I am ADHD and can’t focus — on the contrary I am very task-oriented — but I am most certainly not a permanent settler! This is probably why I have some, umm, excuse me….(ahhh-CHOU!) dandelion in me: I am happy to adapt….to what I want to adapt to….and as long as a few other Bohemians are around, then I will be first in line! Let’s go!

Are you an orchid or a dandelion? Or perhaps something in between? And why?

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Footnote — For the full Dobbs National Geographic magazine article, go to this link: Restless Genes

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This work by Professor Taboo is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at https://professortaboo.wordpress.com.

My Heretical Heritage

Posted on April 2, 2013 by Professor Taboo

Before the 15^th century word heretics had become common in Europe, three centuries earlier there was one group of non-conformists around the southeastern town of Lyon, France known as “the poor of Lyons” or the Waldensians. In the literature of the time these “heretics” followed the teachings of a man known variously as Valdes, Valdesius, Valdensius, and Waldo (Valdo) from the city of Lyons. Their apparent break from mainstream Catholicism began in about 1170 CE not because they gave up a life of comfort and wealth – in medieval Europe this was quite popular and common – but because Waldo began translating the Holy Scriptures into common speech and then allowed lay people to read it and share it anywhere.

Chambons, Italy

If anyone is aware and knowledgeable of medieval Europe and the stranglehold the Roman Catholic Church and Vatican had over its parishioners and daily life, then you know the punishment for dissension or heresy was no slap-on-the-hand. If the fathers or bishops deemed your behavior severe, you could lose your life or soul, or both. The practices of Waldo and his followers was ecclesiastical usurping: no one other than the church pontiffs could interpret and teach the Bible. This crime was punishable by excommunication. These are the times my maternal ancestors come from: Waldensians: the Bonnet clan of Chambons-Mentoulles of Cluson Valley, Italy and Lyon, France.

* * * * * * * * * *

Waldensian children were not spared – Piedmont

Groups of “heretics” began surfacing all over 12^th and 13^th century Europe as the Vatican and Pope Lucias III persecuted such dissension more and more. Many groups, including my ancestors, went into hiding or fled. My ancestors eluded numerous arrests and escaped massacre after massacre. During the late 1400’s several groups were fleeing into parts of Switzerland, and Germany, then Prussia the eventual birthplace of the Protestant Reformation. By 1532 because of many doctrinal similarities the Waldensians officially joined the European Reformation inside congregations of Presbyterian and Calvinist churches. The Bonnet clan (pronounced Bonné) and others found refuge in the Cluson Valley just outside of Turin. They would soon be tracked down there.

The Catholic Duke of Savoy located the Waldensians (also known as the Vaudois) in the Piedmont region of Italy in April 1655. This is known as the Piedmont Easter Massacre. The English poet John Milton pinned a sonnet about the slaughter:

“Avenge, O Lord, thy slaughtered saints, whose bones
Lie scattered on the Alpine mountains cold,
Even them who kept thy truth so pure of old,
When all our fathers worshiped stocks and stones;

Forget not: in thy book record their groans
Who were thy sheep and in their ancient fold
Slain by the bloody Piedmontese that rolled
Mother with infant down the rocks. Their moans

The vales redoubled to the hills, and they
To Heaven. Their martyred blood and ashes sow
O’er all th’ Italian fields where still doth sway

The triple tyrant; that from these may grow
A hundredfold, who having learnt thy way
Early may fly the Babylonian woe.”

Elisabeth Charlotte

The Bonnet clan once again escaped…miraculously. By 1699 persecutions and inquisitions by the Papacy and King Louis XIV forced my ancestors into hiding and fleeing again. They settled their families in Charlottenberg, Germany outside of Koblenz. There were 91 families remaining of Waldensians and Huguenot refugees from Italy, all welcomed by the Countess Elisabeth Charlotte Melander von Holzapfel-Schaumburg of Prussia (whew, say that 3-times fast!). The hills and castles still exist there today as the town of Holzappel, Germany.

The late 17^th century found many agricultural and economic hardships, even for The Poor of Lyons who graciously chose a modest frugal life focusing on others. During the decades of 1830 to 1840, many Waldensians and Prussians had heard about and read about the ease of acquiring land deeds in a place called The Republic of Texas across the Atlantic Ocean. The government there was ambitiously seeking Europeans of non-Spanish origin to come settle throughout central Texas. Texas was near bankruptcy after fighting Mexico for independence and desperately sought to grow and stimulate their economy. Johann Holzapfel from Charlottenberg had already started the immigration from Prussia, to Antwerp, Belgium, and on to Galveston, Texas in 1844. My direct ancestor Philipp Daniel Bonnet (sometimes spelled Phillip) arrived at the port of Indianola, Texas in 1845 just months before the Republic was annexed into the United States.

Much of the settlements of central Texas are of European heritage, particularly German. The group of Prussians my family followed were the ones who founded New Braunfels, Texas. Two generations later my great, great, great, great, great (five greats) grandfather Henry Daniel Bonnet moved to Austin, Texas and helped construct our state capitol building; little to no work could be found as New Braunfels and the surrounding towns had become over-populated with European immigrants seeking employment, land, and religious freedom. My mother’s ancestors and family still populate several towns around Austin, including inside its city-limits.

* * * * * * * * * *

During the flow of immigration into 19^th century Texas, my paternal ancestors arrived as well. Not as much (or as detailed) is known about my father’s ancestors. Perhaps they were not as fortunate inside the kill-infested parts of Catholic Europe. However, and to my good fortune obviously, the few migrated to, settled and stayed near Galveston. My paternal grandfather and grandmother are also of German-French heritage: Miller (Mueller), Konzack, both German on his side, and Tacquard (French) on her side. This side of my family is understandably much more distrustful of large organized religious institutions.

I remember my paternal grandfather had a strong independent personality. He was one of few sons that had graduated from the University of Houston working most of his adult life at a chemical refinery. Not surprisingly my father was agnostic. His mother, my grandmother, I remember had a most kind gentle demeanor with a little pizzazz that shined on the dance floor. She was an intermediate school teacher her entire life. Both naturally loved family life and had unbelievable work ethics; they had to coming from and living through two world wars.

The most precious memories I have of my childhood and adolescence was the never-ending fun me and my cousins would have during family barbecues, beer drinking (by adults of course! Well…), music and dancing on top of the saw-dusted pavilion or barn floor. It was no surprise to me either, that in my same spiritual journey, why or how my two families found each other and became attracted. The historical and genetic record fits nicely onto a most intriguing suspenseful family tree of how I came to be.

Magnolia bloom

I was born into the best two families – deeply bound in an intimate, intense, painful, passionate yet supportive SURVIVING two families – a person could ever wish for. It makes perfect sense why I have such deep Bohemian Free-thinking humanist-caring tendencies! And I thank God…no, correction…the family tree that I come from such an incredible history! I can picture my paternal grandmother teaching my father “We will teach you how to think, and not what to think” and my father passing down the same principle to me. Decades later my mother, working at Southwestern Bell Telephone in Austin, meets my father on a blind date, he a part-time engineering student at the University of Texas in Austin and putting himself through college while working for an electrical company. No surprise, there was a familiar (or familial) chemistry. About four years later cupid’s arrow found its mark and at the risk of stating the obvious…so did my Dad!

One of my dad’s favorite trees was the evergreen magnolia tree, especially when it bloomed. The flowers have a distinct smell, like fresh sweet lemonade. He, myself and my sister planted one in the front yard. When I last drove by the home of my youth, it had grown to some 40-50 feet into the sky. I could only imagine how the neighborhood smelled when it bloomed.

As the past weekend of resurrection stories and folklore prevailed, my larger perspective was much more personal, much more caring in small ways, like a close family who, to understate, has learned in so many ways over so many generations the real-life meaning of Easter.

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This work by Professor Taboo is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at https://professortaboo.wordpress.com.

Rabbits, Eggs and Crucifixions

Posted on March 29, 2013 by Professor Taboo

On this Good Friday and upcoming Easter Sunday, I am reminded again of my many years of Christian fundamentalism and fervor for all things sacred and committed. Three-hundred and sixty-two days out of the year I am typically respectful and tolerant of opposing and differing world-views and faiths. But during those bygone years and Easter weekends I was utterly baffled and amazed of the hundreds, maybe thousands of followers and believers that came out of the woodwork; out of nowhere! Never before had I seen so many unrecognizable faces and families! The outfits and hats, some of them gaudy, you thought you had taken a wrong turn to the red carpet of the Oscars. On top of this awe was the fact that on this particular Sunday I and my family, as weekly members, would have to walk three-times further from our car to enter and exit our church. The parking lot and spaces were filled to capacity that would challenge even Super Bowl Sunday! What saddened me was that I would never see their faces again; maybe I would see them a year later. Maybe.

Having gone to seminary for three years, learning the New Testament inside and out, and knowing (and back then complying) what God’s holy infallible scriptures direct us to do…. there was no possible way for anyone with at least a 9th-grade reading level to not at least comprehend what our/the “Savior” was asking us to do on a daily weekly basis. As a result, Easter Sunday became one of my least favorite Sundays of the entire year. I had developed an unattractive distaste for what it had become: wayward and diluted.

Many things have now changed in my life and I’m happy to say, that in a spiritual, emotional, and mental aspect, for the better. The comical irony of those changes would makeup another post of which I will spare all of you this time. However, in the spirit of the day and holiday weekend, I will share two of my favorite 3-minute songs from Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life and The Life of Brian. These songs always make me smile and happy. Don’t take things too serious but enjoy your holiday weekend in whatever manner you see fit — this is my way. And with that…. Live well, Love much, Laugh often, Learn always.